Living Lightly

In my ongoing effort to prune no longer needed stuff from our home, my most recent purges included:

Kitchen Stuff – bowls, duplicate dishes, trays, lids… With fewer people living in our home now, we don’t need as many cooking supplies and storage containers, so I happily donated some extras to a local second hand shop Thrifting on Eastern. This thrift shop operated by the Brighton Center provides needed household items at affordable prices to people in need.

Personal Care Items – For several months we hosted two international students. It was exciting and mutually enlightening. At the end of their stay, however, there were a number of duplicate personal care items that they didn’t have room for in their luggage such as feminine hygiene products, slippers, toiletries (soaps, shampoo, make-up,) underwear, body scrubbies, extra T-shirts, etc. I gathered these and took them to Mary Magdalene House – a local facility that provides showers, laundry, and supplies to homeless people in the Cincinnati area.

Twin Beds – When our children were young we had a set of bunk beds for our two younger sons. As they grew older we morphed these into separate twin beds. This also worked well for hosting visitors after all our kids were sprung. However, times have changed and one of our grown children gifted us with a new Queen size bed to replace the twin beds. (Perhaps she felt this would also make her life more pleasant when she visited.😊) Anyway, the result was that we put the twin beds on Craig’s List (https://www.wikihow.com/Give-Stuff-Away-on-Craigslist) for free and were happy to pass them on to a local family in need who answered our ad.

These were not sacrificial donations for us since letting go of each of the above items simplified our life of stuff that was just taking up unnecessary space. It felt good to find new homes for things we no longer needed.

There are 2 categories of stuff, however, that are more difficult to part with:

* Sentimental items – my wedding dress and other specialized clothing, remembrances of special occasions, old school yearbooks, photo albums from before digitalizing was invented…

* Stuff our kids are still storing at our house because, “Hey, we might want those old school projects, childhood memorabilia, coin collections, etc. and you have the room to store them and we don’t.”

I leave these latter items for a future blog post. BUT… here are a couple questions for you now:
1. What stuff might still be hanging around your home that you no longer need?
2. How do you discern what sentimental items (family heirlooms, etc.) to keep and what to just take a photo of and discard?

Well, now it’s time to dig deeper into the unnecessary clutter that’s been hanging around our house waiting to be responsibly disposed of or taken to a better home. Our metropolitan curbside recycling service picks up metal cans, glass and plastic bottles/jugs, and paper and cartons weekly. Good. Done.
BUT, the city doesn’t take plastic bags, bubble wrap, small plastic bottles, etc. I had collected quite a few of these items and wanted to be a responsible recycler rather than just dumping them in the garbage can.
Soooo, time to make another trip to the HUB (Cincinnati Recycling and Reuse Hub). Hopefully your community has a similar free resource. I packed my car trunk with 2+ months worth of:

• 50+ plastic bags
• plastic bubble wrap
• 15 #1 plastic tubs
• 3 large Styrofoam packing blocks
• 3 aluminum foil containers
• 20+ small plastic medicine bottles
• 50+ small plastic caps
• 2 non-working pens
• Half used make-up that I don’t use any more
• a pair of wearable but extra sneakers

Then I drove to a local thrift shop and dropped off a skirt and a pair of slacks that I seldom wear.

My home is certainly not yet clear of unneeded stuff, but it feels rewarding to be making progress. The point is to keep acting to be environmentally responsible with packing material and extra stuff.

The next step for me is to more vigorously evaluate what I really need for everyday life. There are still a lot of belongings that

• I seldom use
• I’ve been saving for the kids but they may not want it
• or that I might need in an emergency. But…Hey, such an emergency hasn’t come up in perhaps 10 years

It’s sobering to me to think I have extra clothes that I don’t wear, camping gear that I haven’t used in years, books that I don’t plan to re-read, toys that the grandkids have outgrown, etc. Yet some people don’t have necessary clothes right now, don’t know what fun camping can be, let their kids watch too much TV because there aren’t appealing toys to play with. Hmmm, sounds like decisions for future blog posts.

How do you make decisions about what useful stuff to keep and what to give away?

This past Lent I focused more on my “inner spirituality” than giving stuff away. Once Easter 2024 arrived I figured I’d return to simplifying my life, i.e. serious decluttering. But…this inner spirituality period prompted a deeper self-evaluation. (See It’s Not My Fault entry.) Now it’s time to do something with the stuff I’ve been collecting in the corner of our bedroom and discern where to take the stuff I no longer need. (Examples: Single Use Plastics, clothes I seldom wear, old make-up, and the many papers that clutter my desk.)
Well, that was the plan until I decided to start with Easy-Peasy small stuff – Name tags and $5.

Name Tags: If you’re like me, you probably go to many meetings. Sure, Covid pushed many in person meetings online, but I still attend plenty of work, planning, or dance gatherings in person. Disposable name tags are usually available. Since my memory for names is weakening, I appreciate this help, BUT, I’m also trying to reduce waste and throw away paper name tags and badges.
I realized a simple solution – Make 1 generic name tag. Yes, it’s encased in plastic with a clip on the back, but it’s reusable and fits neatly in my small clutch purse. So, goodbye single use name tags.

5 Dollars: It all started when I dutifully decided to take 13 resource books to a used book store in the greater Cincinnati area.
Most of the information contained in the books could easily be gotten online so our household no longer needed the books and they were not library-worthy. Besides, Half Price Books was willing to reimburse me $5 for my stash of books. They took the books, but since it was almost closing time, they asked me to return to get the money later. Fine. Well, it would probably cost $5 in gas to drive back another day so I decided to wait till I would be in the neighborhood again. A few days later I hoped to stop by but I would have been late for another appointment. Hmmm, as I thought about it, I decided the $5 wasn’t worth it.

Ideas for your consideration:
1. Do you often use disposable name tags? It’s not hard to change to a reusable one. Try it.
2. What’s the most productive way to use $5? What might you buy that would enrich your life or make you happier. Think bigger than yourself. Will you pass anyone this week/month who would appreciate even $5 more. It will lighten your wallet and maybe your heart.

Stay tuned for updates on the other examples in the next few blog posts.

It’s been 3 months since my last post which I usually do at least monthly. Maybe you’ve noticed. Maybe you’ve been busy with your own life. Easter has come and gone and so have I. (Jim and I took a long-delayed trip to Australia and New Zealand with our youngest son and his wife. We not only explored a new-to-us continent and met new people but learned new things about life and living simply.)

One thing I learned these past 3 months is that keeping up with faith, family, and environmental commitments, plus adding Spring gardening can take a lot of time. It prompted guilt in me for not blogging more frequently. Then I asked myself – Which of these commitments is more important? All (except maybe blogging more often). 🙂

So, as you know from my February 22 post, I’ve been trying to focus on my inner spirituality lately and this has happened. What has helped?

1. Daily prayer (although this is not new)
2. A supportive and challenging local and national faith community who keep bringing up new ways to love others and stretch my mind.
3. A supportive spouse who non-judgmentally accepts my weakening memory and reminds me of names, words, and details.
4. Giving myself permission to rest/recreate/reflect on life without feeling it’s a waste of time.
5. A mysterious intrusion of the Spirit who has been telling me that “It’s not my fault.”

Hmmm, you might be thinking – What’s not my fault?

• Global Warming is not my fault. This doesn’t mean I don’t continue to work on environmental issues, especially reducing Single Use Plastics. But…I shouldn’t beat myself up about not yet making a significant difference.
• My memory lapses are not my fault, but it doesn’t mean I don’t make lists.
• Spiritual weaknesses like judging other people and the political mess our country seems to be in. I don’t have to agree or support actions I disagree with but the more I try to reduce judging others as wrong or bad, the more it helps me accept my own imperfections. We’re all human. We all make mistakes. Forgive myself and others. Accept Divine forgiveness. Keep trying.

Hopefully these musings will be more than a personal confession but might resonate with your own self-assessment. Keep trying.

Well, plans have changed. As I pondered whether to give up plastic, clutter, or to give more stuff away for Lent, I decided that any of these sacrifices would be worthy, but it was probably more important to clean out my “soul” and my attitudes than to clean house. Sure, I will try to be more watchful of how much plastic comes into our home and to give more stuff away, BUT I take pride in doing these visible tasks. It feels satisfying; and by telling folks how I’m doing it, I can feel successful.

Letting go of pride. Being more humble and quiet about my accomplishments seems more timely to me right now. Sooo, prompted by my husband who knows me better than anyone, we agreed to have an “inner Lent.” We plan to talk over how we might focus not so much on our successes but on the successes of others. This means paying attention to the people around us, noticing what they might be struggling with and affirming their goodness.

Arise! Happy Easter

So, you won’t be reading about what I do on this blog during March because it’s an inner transformation, but one that I think is needed. I pray that by Easter (which is also the day before April Fools Day 😊), I might be less “full” of myself.

How about you?

As observant Christians have no doubt noticed, this year Valentine’s Day and Ash Wednesday fall on the same day, Feb. 14. So, do we celebrate love, or do we sacrifice? Is there some way that these two “holy” days are connected?  Personally, I plan to celebrate my love for my husband on Valentine’s Eve which of course is also Mardi Gras – a traditional day of fun and feasting. But beyond playing games with the calendar, I think a good case can be made that when we sacrifice our time and possessions for the good of others, it’s a genuine form of love.

So…back to Lent. As Lent approaches each year, my mind typically starts exploring What should I do for Lent this year? Sure, I generally fast from sweets and try to eat no meat which reminds me of people for whom being hungry is not a choice. It’s a gesture of solidarity with the poor and a humbling spiritual awareness. BUT, I still feel the desire to sacrifice beyond eating. So far I’ve narrowed this down to 3 possibilities:

1. A Plastic Free Lent – In this scenario I would “fast” from buying anything made of OR packaged in plastic. Since my husband does the primary grocery shopping, it might be cheating to just let him buy the food that’s packaged in plastic so I don’t have to count it. Also, it doesn’t seem fair to impose my commitment on him. In addition, the packaging I typically get comes unbidden – like something I order on-line and didn’t realize it would be packaged in plastic.
2. One-A-Day Give-Aways – Although I’ve done this in some past Lents, I’m embarrassed to look around our home and notice that there are clothes that I haven’t worn in over a year, books that I’ll never read again – even for reference, toys I’ve been saving for out of town grandchildren, and sports equipment that I’ve aged out of. It’s all well organized but could others use my extras?
3. Clearing Clutter – Related to the Give-Aways is stuff that nobody else can use like travel mementos that fill 4 bookcases, file cabinets filled with probably obsolete papers, plus my desk that has too many loose papers reminding me of things to do that are waiting to be done.

I’m not sure which of the above I should do. Could I do all of them? Should I try? If you were faced with the above choices what would you do?

Or even better – what kind of Lenten sacrifices are you considering? Go ahead and put your ideas in the comment section. It might lead me and others to expand our ideas of how Lent can deepen our spiritual life and help us to love our neighbors more fully.

PS: For those who care, Bottled Water Contains More Plastic Particles Than Previously Thought.(Bloomberg, Jan. 2024)

I profess to be a Christian and thus believe that Jesus calls us to love one another – even our enemies. Of course this moral call transcends Christianity and most faith traditions have a comparable moral code. Even people of good will who profess no particular religion usually have an inner sense to try to be a loving person. But… does loving humanity mean I have to agree with others or like them all? Of course not. I can call out evil and we humans may disagree on what is the right thing to do in conflictual situations.

So, lately I’ve been contemplating my inclination to judge some people who seem to have different values than mine or who just see life differently from me. I’ve been struggling with judgmentalism.

Example #1 – an irresponsible neighbor. On my daily bike ride I noticed that a house several blocks away always had a lot of garbage strewn around their yard. I never saw the resident, but in a fit of altruism, I decided one day to go over and picked up the trash that overflowed into the curbside area and street. Another neighbor saw me and thanked me. I felt virtuous. A couple days later I rode by and a different neighbor stopped me and complained. He said, they were hoping the offending neighbor would be evicted since this had been an ongoing problem. Had I helped or hurt the neighbor? What might be going on in the offending neighbor’s life that caused her to act so irresponsibly. Might she be struggling with financial, emotional, or relationship issues? Maybe an illness? I don’t know.

Example #2 – a difficult relationship. One of the social groups I belong to has a person who has alienated many of the members because of their frequent complaining. I shared this judgement but mostly kept it to myself. One day, however, the individual must have detected my judgmental feelings and confronted me. It was a hard conversation and I don’t imagine we’ll ever be close friends, but we need not be enemies.

These two experiences have taught me something about myself and how I judge other people. It has pushed me to look deeper into why people do things that seem anti-social, or make them difficult for me to like. Instead of focusing on the other’s offense, likeability, or political opinion that differs from mine, I’m trying to ponder what in the other’s history might have caused their behavior. Perhaps they had a troubled childhood, some hurtful relationships, feelings of inadequacy, or simply a different life experience from my own. Certainly I have my own baggage that others might find unappealing.

From these experiences, I find myself moved to humility, compassion, and more careful listening. Before I jump to criticizing and judging I’m trying to remember that for some people I might be the difficult person that they are trying to love.

Who do you find difficult to love? Why? How do you strive to love better?

Anyone living into adulthood (and sooner for some) will inevitably encounter hardships and pain. It might be physical (an illness, broken bones), emotional (depression, self-doubt), relational (a hurting relationship, annoying people), or spiritual (Is there really a loving God? How to love myself or other difficult people?)
Lately I’ve been thinking about such negative life experiences prompted by some health concerns, some difficult relationships, and the sorry state of planet earth in general. My first reactions often include worry, anger, or avoidance.

But sometimes a Spirit of quest and curiosity follow my negative reactions. Perhaps it is coincidence, a need to resolve the discomfort, or the entering of the Spirit through prayer. I’m not really sure, but I’ve started looking at these negative experiences as opportunities – as unwelcome but positive impulses to make needed changes in my life. I should listen to them. For example:

• Health Hurdles – Hardly anyone ever welcomes a colonoscopy. My recent one raised no serious concerns but it triggered several additional tests and combined with 6 other medical appointments within 2 weeks, prompted me to reflect on how many people deal with serious physical pain. It complicated my life for awhile but the bigger learning was a feeling of compassion for those with acute or ongoing health concerns. It was humbling to move out of focusing on my minor ailments to unite with those in greater need.
• Mistakes & Failures – I tried to do a good deed recently and it backfired. I decided to clean up litter around neighbor A’s home. I felt virtuous. However, another, closer, neighbor later told me that they were hoping the litterer would be evicted since this was just a small symptom of bigger problems with neighbor A. Who was right? Who cares? The lesson I learned was to reduce judgement, and self-righteousness. Seeing both sides of the problem expanded my vision. What can I learn from mistakes I’ve made? Often more than if I luckily avoided the mistake in the first place.
• Criticizing Others – At a recent conference I attended a talk that was way too long and not well delivered. I was annoyed and felt I had wasted my time. But further reflection prompted me to wonder what might be going on in this particular presenter’s life? Do I sometimes bore people? Perhaps this negative experience can help me be more compassionate with my fellow humans and myself. Not every bad or painful experience is to be avoided – it might prompt a new, more creative solution to a problem.
• The recent heat-wave – Most people on planet Earth have been suffering under record breaking heat this summer. It’s oppressive. It slows me down. I worry about the future, BUT maybe being disturbed is an important wake-up call to making substantive change in governmental and corporate environmental policies. Hopefully this unwelcome crisis will prompt needed actions which in the long run will be life-saving.

What do You think?